Missing Homie! Stress Free Life?!

4th day at work. Everyday, I am missing my new homie. True that I hate some parts of it. Then again, the sad part of my house – I pay so much to have a roof over my head when 80% of my time is spent in the office.

Not sure how the world works. I think fundamentally, something is wrong. Work should be 1 part of life to get $$ but gradually it’s dominating a major part of the life. I wonder if people of the past ever knew how to calculate.

There’s 24hrs in a day. 8hrs goes to sleeping. 2-3hrs spent on travelling, 2-3hrs spent eating.  That leaves us with 10hrs. So out of this remaining 10hrs, someone dictate that we should work min. 8hrs. What about play?! What about fun?! Dun tell me work is fun. That’s crap. Even if your hobby is your job. Seriously, it will never replace the real fun.

So how can I spend time out of this just dedicated to my homie? REALLY!

 

Was telling uncle markie while watching my usual 9pm drama yesterday.

As usual, after complaining all there is (e.g. white patches on my black couch, work work work and how stupid someone in the neighbourhood stole my shoes, etc etc); we talked about the topic of stress.

I never knew what’s stress is about. As in, I did not ever think that I experienced stress before. I always have panic attacks. That I know. Coz when something goes wrong or when I miss a dateline, there is this subconscious fear that something bad will happen & I will start to break into cold sweat. All along I just took it as a normal condition.I just thought that coz I love to plan & follow my plans. If something deviates, I get pissed off. Apparently, uncle markie differs.

He never felt that way. 😦

Sighz, I feel inadept actually. My envt makes me feel like I am constantly not good. Constantly lacking in something. Throughout my years of living so far, I have been quite on top. Now, it’s like I am constantly being judged. Constantly not good, constantly below target. I totally miss the freedom of doing my own things my way.

I get envious of uncle markie at times. He can seem so contented. I dunno it’s coz he is smart & good at what he does or I am really dumb & dun put in enough effort in what I do.Both saggi but personality so different.

Reminds me of JLPT. They say put in min 1yr of studying can get 1 cert. I did it within 6mths to get my cert. There was this drive then. Now, I seem to lose it. Everything is more of going through the routine & yet being trialed every day. Damn tiring.

 

Sighz, I hope good news come next week. I really need that line of hope!

Driving test is approaching. Better be a breeze. After which, I am so going to get my Wilton Decorating Cake certs. Can’t wait!

Back to work…

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