As per the new HK drama that I am watching. Some old folks will say…Chinese traditions have came a freaking long way – thousands of years. Of course no matter what, there will be proof to all the teachings & followings.
So…came the influx of ideas of ‘ancient wisdom’; basically unproven myths & old wives tales. & the best part of all, EVERYTHING is blame the mother…hahahahaha I wonder if people have ever thought that it’s fated as well? If the kid is determined to come out safely…even if one threw the kid into a rubbish chute after birth, it will still be as fine.
Not that I am a super extremist on alot of the superstitions. I just feel that the reason why women has to be more careful during pregnancy is coz u are carrying a life. So it’s possible that you need to take more care.However, not all kids can live. Precisely why? Coz it’s a world of survival of the fittest! Not about your emotions, not about your feelings, not about you. Feel sad? Of course. We are the only animal with tons of neurons that trigger emotions. But what can u do? It’s LIFE!
So, if the kid does choose to come out early, fated to be born in a certain way…that’s out of our control isn’t it? Not thinking about it or not even within your consideration set does not make what’s ultimately coming to totally stop from happening. Multiple scans, tests will only help screen & not help prevent what’s there to come.
OF COURSE…then there are people who will say…u are supposed to eat well, sleep well & drink well to have a healthy kid. Avoid all the things stated in old wives tale. Cannot eat this cannot eat that, no massages, no cold water blah blah blah. ERMz…it’s not that easy. If your chromosomes & genes are bad…it’s bad. What can u do about it? I always wanted a pretty baby. But I know it won’t happen. My genes are not the pretty sort. Uncle Mark’s is definitely not a hunk. So what can we expect? Though I always say that if not cute, I wont take care. But if push comes to shove. It’s still your kid. I may not have the passion but I definitely have not lost the humanity in me!
So it’s utterly amazing how people can feel so much when I speak in a nonchalant tone about the kid. Do I not care? Well…not that I dun. I just feel that there’s nothing I can do also. Eat well? Not that I dun want to but I feel like puking all the time. Show more love for the kids…well…I can only think about the pain b4 even thinking about the end product…hahahahahaa so is this considered to be not prepared to be a mum? I have my stand & thoughts on that. Your personality should never be covered by a role.
Being a mum is a role. It’s not your personality. Because you are a mum does not mean that you stop being yourself. All just cause you want to show your kid the ‘right’ example. There’s this nurture vs nature debate that has always caused lots of sparks. I totally agree that something that is nature, u can nurture tons…if it’s innate, cannot be changed…it wont change. & that’s personality to me. Am I childish, selfish, brat at many times? Yes. Am I born this way? Maybe. Does nurture plays a part? Of course! My parents must have indoctrinated me some values that made me who I am today. But if my personality was not receptive to those ideas…how much influence can it made on me?
Similarly. If my kid turns out to be a nasty kid. Of course I can teach. Does it mean that innately, he/she will never be nasty again? Maybe not. Coz it might be already ingrained into that child.
I can only look at both extreme possibilities & embrace that there’s a chance that things might happen either way. If it really happens, then look at it in a matter of fact way that there’s nothing u can do but to work within your means to try to change things. Apart from that…what else?! Love? Hmmz, not that I am heartless but in this world, practicality matters more than anything else.