Catchup

What’s up with the hols?

Apart from sch work, there’s much to celebrate and much to grieve for. 

Ah gong passed away. I believed it’s a peaceful departure.

In life there’s so much we have to face and I think grief is just 1 emotion that people have to learn to deal with along the way. 

I am never good with comforting words nor showing compassion of sorts. Call me a cynic/ skeptic whatsoever. It’s something that as a biological intelligence, we have to accept the sweets + sorrows. The living has to keep living and I am sure ah gong had a great time throughout his years of living as well. 

 

Meetups.

It’s been a great time catching up with friends. I lack adult talk at times. Afterall, my life is now primarily centered around kids.

Despite the highly lack of photos taken during the teachers’ day outing @ vivo, it has given me some insight to people in general. Sometimes, we just do not need to gripe too much or over-think certain things. I understand the lack of commitment when it comes to meetups for some. In particularly, I am 1 of those. Not that I do not want to meetup or purposely fly other’s ‘planes’. Not every meetup can be met by all. Timing and fate plays a part. You just have to choose and life is all about choices. 

Sure there will be times where questions are raised. Why did you not choose to come to my meetup session? Are you that busy? Why can’t you bring your son? Or do you just not want to meet up with me? What if you were me? How will you feel? Didnt we used to be close? 

There’s just too many what ifs and whys.

If you treasure the friendship and feel that I make up excuses to not attend. So be it. I cant please everyone and honestly, that’s not my main goal in life either. 

Some feel that I treat friendship super lightly. There’s many times where I forsake friendships easily by showing attitude or pure cold treatment. In fact, as I am typing, I already have a list of  people who I have ever treated that way. Sometimes, it’s not on purpose. Just that maybe at that point in time, that someone did some actions that irked me which resulted in a huge put-off reaction from me. I am not the type who will say the truth in your face if I know the truth hurts. Call me 2-faced. That’s just me. Some may say – It’s so trivial! 

Precisely. I cant deny. It’s just the emotion that I had at that point in time & I can’t compromise with myself. The only way? Discard that emotion and make myself better. If disassociating with that person makes me feel better. I will do it. 

Self-centered. I agree totally and no more less. Life is too short to dwell on such things. 

A recent example. I commented on a friend’s FB post on the topic of parenting. It was a simple remark from my point of view. No intention made to harm anyone. No intention made for that friend to follow my advice. It was a pure simple comment sharing what I did. Did I do wrong? Honestly, from medical point of view, I know it’s not the best method. I know the risks involved. I know the reasons why people do not do what I do. Do I slammed them? No. Did I consult the PD when doing this? Of course! So I take extra precautions. 

However, the comment which I made sparked off a tons of comments slamming my views and the way it was written in caps and all made me feel like I was a sinner, a bad mum, etc. Why should I feel this way and subject myself to read such posts triggering my notifications every other min as though I am an idiot?  I simply ‘un-friend’ this person. Is it her fault? No. 

Just that somehow, I can’t help but have the thinking birds of the same feathers flock together. 

Petty? Yes. I do think that I am. Not all the time. Sometimes. Regret? Not really. Life is all about living the moment and celebrating the future. People move on. Personality changes with situations and times. That I agree. Me @ 40 vs me @ 60 will be different. However, the core will always remain the same.

Then again, I never once said my core falls under the category of nice. 

 

Dates. 

Uncle markie and I managed to spend some couple time during the hols. A quick lunch, movie and coffee. Small and sweet. 

Everyday, we just need to feel life is already blissful and the next day will be better. 

 

 

 

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